Hard Day with the Culture

Before lunch time the kids wanted to go to the play ground but they wanted me to go with them. They usually go with their babysitter. I had spent 2 hours this morning with one of my teachers asking her some cultural questions and trying to better understand the my friends and the people. One thing I was told and understand is that they are very indirect people. I guess in some ways they are and in others they are not. They are not very indirect when they tell me my kids are not wearing enough clothing! Ironically people were making comments today because my kids had hats and gloves on. It's pretty cold here but I guess not freezing cold so they were saying we had too much on. I guess I can't please anyone. That was a little frustrating but what got me today deals with us bringing sand toys with us to play with. We have a couple of buckets, shovels and fun stuff like that. When we arrived at the playground no one was there but within 10 minutes we had a crowd. I am starting to think they wait until the foreigners come so they can play with our toys. We had built a sand castle but then a little boy came and kicked it over. His mom didn't say anything. Another kid came and took a shovel and went off to play. Then when Elijah got upset that the boy who kicked over his castle purposefully took a toy out of his hand the other moms and grandmas were talking about how my kid don't share. We had about 4 kids using our toys and so my kids were a little frustrated. I was frustrated that the moms and grandma don't do anything to their kids when they do things to other people. The little boy who kicked over Elijah's sand castle spent the next 20 minutes taking the toy Elijah was playing with and running away. Elijah called him didi which is what he calls boys younger than him but then it clicked in my mind. Whenever we talk about OUR DIDI he is upset and doesn't want to share. He's seen pictures of our didi Ian and he looks like the kids at the playground. I think he thinks Ian will act like the kids do. Once I realized this I told both kids that we would train our didi to not do the things the kids were doing around them.
Once I had enough and was done with the other ladies talking bad about my kids we went home. Ironically everyone else went home too. I tried to explain to our babysitter that Ev was upset because she has to share with the kids who take her toys without asking yet when we don't bring our toys the kids won't let her play.
There was a point where both kids were wanting me to help. I didn't know how to socially stand up for my kids in that situation. Being too direct with them would cause them to lose face, yet at times they are too direct.
In the past when it has been just me and the kids at the playground and we had our sand toys up because we were not using them. I've watched kids try to walk off with them. We've had some things stolen before so I feel I have to watch our things really carefully. I'm done with the interactions at the playground.